ALICIA WOOD: The past month..

It's been a while since I've blogged.
I guess I've just been really busy.
And I've wondered how many people actually read my blog...
This isn't going to be very long.
I'll start with January.

On New Years Eve I went to a party where I learned how much I've grown up.
Without going into detail, I kept myself out of a very dangerous situation.
As I went back to the party, people I've never even met told me how proud they were of me for standing up for myself.
I'm growing up?
Scary...

I moved back to Idaho.
My mom helped and it's been nice having a great roommate/friend like Lisa.
This girl puts up with so much from me... and not once does she complain.

Roommates.
Emily. Megan. Heather. Mary. Lisa.
I LOVE THESE GIRLS.
My roommaes for Fall Semester were great.
These roommates are such a blessing.
Words really can't explain how much these girls mean to me.
They understand me. And are true friends.
I don't know what I would do without them.

My classes are going great and I actually love them.
Weird huh?
It's still hard for me sometimes to buckle down and do my homework but I'm doing a lot better than I did last semester.

I've talked to my old flame a little bit since moving up here.
That situation has yet to stop hurting.
But all in good time...

I went on a couple dates with an AMAZING guy.
He's turned out to be one of my good friends and I hope my future husband is very similar to him.

I lost one of my best friends.
Unfortunately, sometimes one person doesn't want what another one does.
So friendships are burned to ashes.
And tears hit the ground like china plates.
Emails can't seem to be deleted quite yet.
Letters reside in an old box in the closet.
And memories are now what I dream about in my sleep.
But again...
All in good time.

My best friend Kira Williams and her awesome boyfriend Carson Pace came to visit me one weekend.
Best. Weekend. Ever.
I seriously love these two more than I can explain.
I've always been worried about losing my best friend to marriage.
I'm not going to lose a best friend.
Because I'll gain another best friend.
I know that I can always count on Kira and Carson.
Thanks guys :)

Sad day.
I can't go on a mission.
At least not when I was hoping to.
This has been the most heart aching experience I've ever had to go through.
It's kind of a long story and very personal.
I have some medical problems that need to be taken care of and figured out.
As well as some personal problems that I need to overcome.
But as I talked to my bishop about how excited I was to serve a mission.
I knew something was wrong.
And my goal everyday, every week, is to not cry because I can no longer go right now.

For the first time in my life, I don't have a plan.
I don't know what I want my major to be.
I thought I was going to be married by now, or maybe engaged.
When that didn't happen...
I knew with all my mind and heart that a mission was the biggest desire I've ever had in my entire life.
And now that's not happening...
Everyday I wonder... what now?
What am I supposed to do?
And it scares me that I have absolutely no idea...

I was called to be the Relief Society 1st Counselor.
It has been such a blessing.
It's a huge sacrifice but I LOVE my calling.

I get to teach the lesson on Sunday in Relief Society.
I've entitled it "What Heaven Sees in You"
I'll give more details after I give the lesson.

It's been a really hard month.
Lisa told me that I should write a book about my life. Because it seems like I never get a break.
I'm glad someone else finally thinks so.
But I've learned that it helps me become stronger... I just don't know how much more I can take.

I've learned to keep my head up.
I've learned it's really okay to cry.
I've learned who my true friends are.
I've learned how much my family means to me.
I've learned I love the gospel.

Life is hard.
But it's what you make it.
I try to smile.
And when I simply can't, I pray for a happier day tomorrow.

I LOVE MY LIFE